ok...After going through 8 lessons of Dean Sherman talks on handling relationship over the past 2 months. I have a clearer picture and better understand of "I love you" and "I Lust you"...a selfish act which is not of God. Below are some general points, i've learnt from the teaching and I want to share it with you, my friends.
A Dating Philosophy
1)
Avoid the dating sydrome (date just to date). because the dating culture has produced the divorce culture so always ask yourself, "What is the best way to get to know this person?"
I've learnt ..and i want to be a Human with value than just being a DATE.
2)
Giving up my rights to sex and marriage. Giving it up to GOd , God can give it back as a privilege. If i have it as a right it will govern all my thinkings. I can only do this if i Trust GOd.
I can ask God to lead me to a very good person..who is good for me..but can I Trust Him?
3)
Take time to develop non-romantic relationships. I've learnt to take time..not rushing into a relationship, not having a need to have a partner. Start out by enjoying groups. Be in context where deep relationship can be formed without tension and the awkwardness of romantic possibilities. Then you can marry a friend instead of a date! Breaking away from spending time with romantic person ONLY...or only be with people who have romantic attraction.
4)
Getting myself free and straightened out is about being Free from SIN, Free from personality hang ups (e.g. treating people coldly, just being quiet and acting as though nothing has happened when theres a problem), giving higher priority to personality(personality development) and development than to date-ability.
-Childhood-development of character
-Adolescence-apprentice adult
-Adulthood-place of responsibilty
A Dating Progression
This one really hit me! God is speaking to me thru these..
1. Admit in honesty when i feel romantic attraction for the person (from the very beginning)...to minimise Hurt.
2.Seek the Lord. Ask if its right and ask for direction. If God says "No" trust that God knows best..because God is a loving God..he won't want you to be hurt either.
3.Making Jesus the Lord of My emotions. Dun be a emotional prositute..yes the word is "prositute" by giving emotions away to people who is maybe e.g. cute, pretty, smiles at you and etc. In other words...dun just freely give your emotions away..until God says YES.
4.Submitting and communicate my relationship to an Objective. (non emotionally involved) person. Pastor, Parents or mentors.
5.Communicate with my partner. communicating in the right timing, communicate wisely and unselfishly( don't shock or manipulate) and communicate continually.
6.Determine to please God (most important)
Every problem in the world is a problem of relationship..If you dun relate well, you are part of the problem.
Thinking highly of yourself than you ought to think is a problem..which leads to PRIDE.
why a relationship fails? because someone is thinking highly of oneself than they ought to think.
The only antidote to Pride is Humidity. Thinking with sober judgement.
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I thank God for showing me all these. God is still speaking to me..thru the cell group..and the teaching..
There is so much to learnt..Now i truely understand what is being thirsty for more, being desperate for HIM, being filled up. I am still deciding the right time to go for "Hardcore" deliverance...I know i must be prepared or else i wun be able to take it...Kev has gone through it..and i can see he is a happier person now..Love this Brother..i've yet to experience the burden taken off me..feeling light..after deliverance.I trust that God will tell me the right time as i Seek.
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Kev, Josh, Gerald and Me plan to go to malaysia for a short holiday..in the coming Nov...haha..well..planning is going quite smoothly..kev said the trip is confirmed..We are all quite excited about it...haha.
